Memories of Éire

“How was Ireland?” A question I never thought I'd find myself dreading. Yet in the days since my return from Ireland I have, at times, dreaded that question. It's not that I don't want to talk about my trip, but I don't feel like I can answer that question well. Like Kara, I have found that it can be a very hard question to answer, and one that I'd really rather not answer at times. It's almost like people are asking me a personal question, which perhaps sounds strange. But I feel like whenever I share my experiences, even a small part, I am somehow sharing a very personal part of my life. Even writing this blog, I feel like I have so much I want to say, yet I keep going back and changing it, unable to decide what to say.

But in truth, how do you tell people about an experience that changed your life? How do you express the ways your entire perspective changed by living in another culture, even if it was a brief 6 week period? People want to hear about how green it was, how amazing it was, but don't seem to be as prepared for the word “life-changing” to be thrown in there. And even if they wanted to more about how it was life-changing, I don't know that I could answer that question. Even with several weeks now to have thought about my time in Ireland, I am still unable to really understand how it changed me. I know it did. I just can't express how.

I imagine there will be days in the future, maybe even years from now, where I look back to my Irish Studies trip and see how it influenced my life. From the times of deep reflection at Whitehead lighthouse and on the shores of the North Coast, the conversations at Lakeside, to the encouragement of Billy Stevenson, Ross Wilson and Derick Bingham, God used my time in Northern Ireland to continue His shaping and reforming of my life. It may have only been six weeks, but I feel like I learned about six months worth of life knowledge and spiritual growth during that time.

Though that is all wonderful, and the memories I have are important, I am still left with the question of where to go from here. A life change is worthless if it does not actually change the way you live your life. It is also worthless if you are stuck in the past, unwilling to move on to the future. One thing I did not want to do upon my return from Ireland was to be “stuck” in Ireland. That is, I didn't want to miss the memories happening in my own backyard. Though I may long for Ireland, I'll never get there by being stuck in the past. So though I have spent time remembering Ireland, and taking about it, and even though I do have times of “Irish homesickness” I also have been looking towards the coming year. Praying over the opportunities I have and for the memories I'll make. I hope to someday return to Ireland, but more important is to carry the memories and lessons of Ireland with me as I walk the calling God has put before me, day by day, with an eye on what is to come, what is going on now, and where I have come from—my memories of Éire.